The Amazing Maurice And His Educated Rodents Quotes
"One day, when he was naughty, Mr. Bunnsy looked over the hedge into Farmer Fred's field and it was full of green lettuces. Mr. Bunnsy, however, was not full of lettuces. This did not seem fair."
"But there was more to it than that. As the amazing Maurice said, it was just a story about people and rats. And the difficult part of it was deciding who the people were, and who were the rats."
"There's such a thing as too much pronunciation, kid."
"They pay soldiers. They have wars. In fact, we've prob'ly stopped a lot of wars by taking the money and putting it where it can't do any harm."
"You can't be too careful these days. There's a lot of funny people about."
"Good man. Sensible. The more you struggle, the harder they bite."
"They said he was amazing. The Amazing Maurice, they said. He'd never meant to be amazing. It had just happened."
"You had to be smart to live for four years on these streets, especially with all the dog gangs and freelance furriers."
"Hey, stupid-looking kid! How would you like to make your fortu—nah, kid, I'm down here…"
"People listened to Hamnpork because he was the leader, but they listened to Darktan because he was often telling you things that you really, really needed to know if you wanted to go on living."
"Honest traps that killed outright… well, they were bad, but you could usually avoid them and at least there was something clean about them. Live traps were like poison. They cheated."
"No-one, not even Hamnpork, had a sense of smell like Dangerous Beans."
"She has been in a trap," said Peaches. "And then she met us."
"We can think about what we do. We can pity the innocent one who means us no harm. And that's why she can stay."
"But I do, sir," said Darktan, speaking in the same calm voice. "And I'm telling you that there's a couple of things about some of these new traps I don't understand, and until I understand them I'd very respectfully suggest you leave it all to me."
"There's always a plot. You just have to know where to look."
"The world hasn't got a plot," said Maurice. "Things just… happen, one after another."
"Everything we've done we've done because we've stuck together," said Peaches.
"You should never say no to a piece of string," said Sardines earnestly.
"Sometimes I have nightmares where I burp and he—"
"Cats don't go round feeling sorry! Or guilty! We never regret anything!"
"I thought we could be more than things that squeak and widdle."
"If you don't turn your life into a story, you just become a part of someone else's story."
"You keep changing it until you find one that does."
"Governments are very dangerous criminals and steal money from people."
"No-one could really be as useless as that unless it was a disguise."
"My father says you can't run a city on stories. He says you have to be practical."
"I used to get beaten when I was small for telling stories."
"Sometimes on dark nights I think I can hear him talking down there!"
"There was even a hiss of escaping steam, and here and there warm water dipped into a gutter that ran along the bottom of the tunnel."
"Maurice was thirsty. He leaned down, tongue out—"
"A few rats were milling around in the cellar when they finally arrived."
"There was still a candle burning in the cellar. Darktan was surprised."
"This isn't… the way a… an old rat should die."
"I think it was just too much for him," said Darktan. "Just too much."
"Then I shall dream there and… never wake up."
"Bury him," he said. "And mark the place so we know he's there."
"He means by widdling on it," said the rat beside him.
"He was a rat from a long line of rats and he thought about rats."
"If the leader doesn't know what he's doing, no-one else does, either."
"All right, think of the future as a great big trap," said Sardines. "With no cheese."
"You know I used to hang around in the theatre an' that," said Sardines.
"We're nothing but rats," said Dangerous Beans.
"I don't know about any islands, I really don't," said Darktan. "But when I was in that… place, I… saw the shape of an idea."
"Rat kings are deeply mysterious," she said. "A rat king is a group of rats with their tails tied together."
"They were just another story, too. A silly story about rats who thought they weren't rats," said Dangerous Beans.
"That's what you have to do… no, it wouldn't work, we'd need a lot of cotton-wool…"
"Mess with us and you will see… we'll put poison in your tea!"
"You can't lose more than one life at a time, even if you're a cat."
"I prefer our way. We are silly and weak, sometimes. But together we are strong."