Lost At Sea: The Jon Ronson Mysteries Quotes
"Truth is we follow GOD!!! We’ve always been behind him."
"If you died today, God forbid, if you were hit by a car and you had to turn the crank to your own riddle box, what would pop out?"
"Who looks at the stars at night and says, ‘Oh, those are gaseous forms of plutonium?’ No! You look at the stars and you think, ‘Those are beautiful.’"
"I was a fucking thief for a living, hustling, getting money, we were balls-deep in that shit."
"When you die you have to face your own beast."
"It felt so good, brother. I was fucking in heaven."
"We think for a living. We try to create. And every once in a while there’s a breakdown in the engine."
"I can’t think of anything to say about that. Sorry. I’m still kind of someplace else."
"I love Martine Rothblatt. Martine is my timeless love, my soul mate."
"She was doing great for the first ten years after Vietnam. His wife got pregnant, and she had a baby, and he was doing a little worse, and then she had a second baby and he went kooky."
"What is sad? Does it have anything to do with happy?"
"I became the mother of everyone else in the family. Handling all their stuff. And I’m still doing it."
"I have never known anything else, only my master."
"The idea is for the unblindfolded kids to telepathically communicate to the blindfolded ones where the tables and chairs and pillars are."
"You’re a person from the street and you speak of your experiences. Then at the end you can tell them: God has helped me."
"I’ve lived around fog my whole life, so maybe I’m blasé."
"If you have more than fifteen yes answers, your child is almost definitely Indigo."
"Fuckin’ rainbows after it rains. There’s enough miracles here to blow your brains."
"Having an Aston Martin is, I reflect, like having a face made of gold. Some people are awed, others hate you and want to hurt you."
"I stumble back to the hotel and to bed. At 3:56 a.m. I awake with a confused shriek, grab my notepad, and scrawl, '3:56 a.m. Hair triangle horse chest,' and then fall asleep again."
"Bond awoke the next morning, fresh as a daisy, had breakfast and a double coffee at the railway station, and then jumped in his car to continue his pursuit of Goldfinger."
"Had this been the case in Bond’s day, would he have eaten a Twix for breakfast? I wonder."
"Duncan is annoyed with me. I guess we’ve got cabin fever, having been cooped up together in this Aston Martin for hours."
"Ironically, Bond actually was slapped in the face by Tilly, his passenger, after he gave her one master/slave eye flurry too many."
"‘Turn off the iPhone!’ Duncan snaps. ‘Turn off your e-mails. Just experience the car and the road. Just experience it!’"
"‘So you’re saying that to truly enjoy the car, I have to break the law?’ I say."
"I feel like Han Solo in hyperdrive, or Jeremy Clarkson. It feels fantastic. No wonder the rich and boorish love themselves."
"I did crash," he says, impatiently, "but that isn’t the point."
"‘Oh, Ray, you silly bugger.’ And you know what? There’s not been one single word of criticism."
"‘I am,’ he says. ‘My own storytelling powers.’"
"I’ve been spending so much time at home on the Internet on sites like AboveTopSecret.com."
"This is the tunnel at Prestbury. It’s the richest village in England. It’s where all the grand footballers and executives live."
"If only pretty girls were always angry they would be beautiful."
"‘I can see why you’d want to,’ he replies. ‘My father bought me one of these when I was seventeen.’"
"‘I am a human being.’ Then he gives me a look as if to say, ‘Are you human? Coming here asking me all these questions?’"
"I said to the doctor, ‘Leave me. Just for a bit.’ And he went away. And I picked up the pillow and smothered him until he was dead."
"If you’re going to leave it up to the mob to decide what’s important, it’ll be this really cool video game."
"I've told her, but I don't think she believes me."
"They were so death-obsessed, it’s probably good to keep them away from guns."
"These boys had just turned thirteen years old."
"The police chief believes it, and who is more honest than the chief of police?"
"It’s surprising to see such a twinkly-eyed old lady so heavily armed."
"When you’ve got that many bears, you’re not going to be liberal."
"Being a Santa’s elf connects us with real people all around the world."
"Santa, that is my wish for Christmas. To wear a lot of clothes."
"The only way in which to make banking a competitive industry is to remove all obstacles to potential new entrants into the industry."
"In terms of the small print, they have made 'huge steps forward in the past twelve to eighteen months.'"
"The sheer scale of consumer debt £1trillion£1 trillion£1trillion has made millions of households extremely vulnerable to shocks to the economy."
"By using a Post-it note, we are attempting to highlight the key issue for potential customers, which is to contact Capital One."
"A customer in need sits down with their bank manager, who says, 'A thousand pounds? You must be crazy! I’ll give you three hundred.'"
"People are just being sold things. And this is an industry that’s self-regulating. Why is that?"
"The banks make tens of millions from these wheezes."
"We treat our bank managers like we treat our doctors. They say, 'Ah, you’ll need to buy some insurance with that, sir.'"
"He said he was using each card to pay off the charges on the others."
"I can tell you, Mrs. Cullen, that is very high. That concludes the postmortem evidence."
"Twenty years is a long time. That’s a lease on life."
"It’s supposed to be the Lord’s number," says Casey. "The opposite of 666."
"I feel like I’m defiling myself," says Casey.
"I’m debating whether to keep my eyes open when they put the knockout drug into me," says Casey.
"I’m just, uh, trying to stay open to what God wants," says Casey.
"I keep asking myself, ‘Why did I donate?’" he says.
"A lot of people pray to God for a miracle specifically relating to kidney failure, and all it takes is someone to step forward and say, ‘I’ll do it.’ That’s the miracle."
"I’ve learned what I can from this," she says. "I don’t judge much of anybody for anything."
"I’ve never done anything as important as this in my ministry," he tells me.
"I’m a midwife to the dying—for those who want to hasten their deaths."
"I think it’s the reason I’m placed on this planet."
"I’ve ordered a magic potion because I certainly don’t intend to travel to Dublin," he replies.
"I stop while others walk by and ignore their pleas."
"George will get to a point where he’ll run out of money," she says.
"Otherwise these people wouldn’t be hanging on for years and years and years."
"It’s not even something I was aware of happening until I spoke to the police."
"It’s like I put my emotions in a room and shut the door."
"This incredible dark cloud came over me, like a black dog."
"It bothers me quite a lot that I was lying to my parents."
"The accusers have provenly lied on oath—blue front door etc."
"But he did not approach them for sex. He approached them for market research."
"The victims are 'cranks' who 'came out of the woodwork' seeking 'compensation.'"
"I cannot prove that there is a contract in which [the complainants] have agreed to appear on TV or in the newspapers."
"You are no doubt aware that your ex employer the Sun has published a piece linking you to Denning as members of a 'paedophile ring.'"