"When you can't turn it off and you start talking about the soda as you're drinking it, that's when you choke."
"Me when I visit Shiki and she's asleep and I tried to open the alfredo sauce in the fridge when I dropped the jar and I got Alfredo over my hands and I don't know where the towels are."
"Mascot head falls off. How about some March Madness? In the middle of this routine, a mascot at a March Madness game was in the middle of his dance routine when his literal head fell off."
"Joe Biden tries to shake hands with nobody again... Is that what it is? Presidential run poop?"
"One of the most embarrassing things that can happen to an artist is dropping the award when winning it."
"Former President George HW Bush under a spell of nausea vomits on Prime Minister of Japan."
"Norm goes up to his brother Stan and is all like dude you [ __ ] up the whole Arctic."
"I loved every second except for the part where my strap broke."
"There I was again, drunk off white lightning and pissing in my hat, when Barry Obama wandered into my campsite."
"Fitzpatrick under pressure... lost the football."
"Listen, once you've lit something on fire and the fire department comes, I don't think there's going back."
"I had this huge bag of all my supplies and I left it at the house in my excitement."
"His grand heist was thwarted when the fire brigade had to excavate the coal-covered criminal from the chimney, after he became thoroughly stuck."
"That's what you get, Milo! Wait a minute, Milo, you just set the portal alight and totally set yourself on fire! This is perfect!"
"AC6 is an explosive power fantasy of bullets, missiles, and laser swords."
"This may or may not be the hole Haley Deegan sunk my foiler."
"That was my most embarrassing moment ever. I ripped a pair of trousers at the bum crack on national television. Oh my god, these are my mass's trousers."
"It's like giving someone a hammer, a nail, and a plank of wood and asking them to nail it to the wall. Then you come back five minutes later and they've instead put the nail through their thumb and snapped the plank in half."
"Whoops, I caught some of the insulation on fire."
"The shoe was too big, and that's what caused the shoe to come off."
"I broke it by running down a volcano and I tripped on my sandals and I flipped and all my body weight went on my hand."
"It's warm now. Oh, coffee disaster on the floor."
"That was dangerous for a minute there but they all get arrested but then they went into the ocean oh no and the shirt came up oh man a big shark."
"This man showed up to the sub battle, disconnected for 20 seconds, played the King's Gambit, and lost two pieces by the seventh move."
"I just full-on let it go... This was not a clean sausage, no this was full on bad stomach in a panic."
"Apologies to everyone, I thought the camera was on as I got the ember into the tinder bundle and blew it into flame and started the fire."
"The save is cool, but it's like dropping your hot dog, catching it before it hits the floor, and then squeezing it too hard and dropping it anyway."
"I choked on one of them, or maybe two to three of them."
"I ended up getting my first job at Dunkin Donuts and I got fired on my day off."
"Teamwork makes the dream work, my chip fell."
"I was on psychedelics, and I bit into a crawfish shell, and it cracked my tooth. I was tonguing that [ __ ], and he goes, 'What's wrong with you, tooth man? What are you doing? I chipped it eating a crawfish shell. I was so dumb.'"
"One time my unopened box of Honey Bunches of Oats had been torn open."
"I'm a 23-year-old female, and my friend and I went to our hostel in Poland and could not get the door to open."
"I could have dropped my croissant!"
"I accidentally dyed my hair blue trying to fix a leaky faucet."
"I think they messed up with some stuff they weren't supposed to."
"So the wedding is happening and I'm out here watching the Torah fall on the fire, but he's having fun. He's made a couple of friends cuz there's some other kids here."
"I got a Q-tip stuck in here cuz I fell asleep on the massage chair cuz I cracked my rib."
"I got trou last time this that's messed up"
"I went to a wedding, tripped on my own foot, and crashed into the wedding cake."
"I tried baking a skull cake, but instead I ended up with a pharaoh from 1500 BC."
"The worst was my term project was destroyed, cut apart, and then repeatedly smashed with my effing bong."
"...he bumps in the [ __ ] camera."
"First night of vacation and we go to pull out the sofa bed for the kids, hear a loud crunching sound, son's iPhone fell between the cushions and got caught in the hinges of the bed frame."
"Anakin accidentally clips through a barrier while visiting the Geonosian factories."
"The cake is actually destroyed, oh goodness."
"My 11 year old gave my neighbor my 25 fresh of the grill perfectly cooked T-bone steak while I was in the bathroom."
"I nearly lose the post, I nearly lose the [ __ ] post on my ass. So I'm like [ __ ] I jump up, unhook my left foot, and the same thing happens."
"I almost went to Tampa they definitely were not planning on getting back on of this plane cuz they had removed up the luggage now they're putting the luggage back on of course mine is above my head."
"Luckily, I didn't damage a gimbal, that would suck."
"Well, Hawk Jones tried to stand on an empty box, he just goes into it. So, inside it he tries to climb up to get out of the window and he just falls right in."
"Madonna, The Edge, and Dave Grohl all fell off stage during performances."
"I once hired a jet ski but couldn't work out how to stop it, so had to buzz around the bay for 50 minutes until it ran out of petrol."
"I guess the spotlight guy didn't get the memo and he shines the spotlight right on my behind."
"I fell down the stairs and I broke my nose."
"Biscuits! As soon as I touched it, it just started puking."
"The content sure as heck did. I assumed due to the hot water jets some dishes all made of glass by the way kept clanging against each other and broke, and the glass shards flew out breaking other dishes."
"Brick mishaps: when your partner in crime becomes your target."
"I don't know what to do I stuck my arm back in the oven to hold the thing up and kind of get a look and it's just destroyed."
"He dropped an f-bomb into a live mic."
"...I'm about to bump my ass right now."
"Then Marinette fell down because of her clumsiness."
"You're really good at this. It's gonna fall, it's hairspray. Leg down jeans!"
"So I was like, hey, maybe I can do this. So you know there was this part when you can put your fingers on the door and then like you go up and like, and then open, right? Yeah. So I tried it. Did you get stuck? Yeah, I got stuck."
"She's sunburnt she's on vacation and she got sunburnt with sunglasses on."
"He flushed it down the toilet, so now he's got...and he was like shouting in the bathroom, he's like, 'Um, I clogged the toilet.'"
"So yeah, my blush broke today, literally right before I started filming, so I'm not in the best mood."
"It's totally fine to be 24 years old and just completely spill a quarter of your salad on the floor. It's totally fine."
"...one time I was in a school play...I got so nervous I fainted, fell backward, bumped into a backdrop that smashed into a light, and then the whole stage came tumbling down."
"The airline loses my bag with the Paris Dunks and the babes and all the vintage polo in it."
"Joey falls into a cart of food, covering his clothes in the process. Push! Now, if this was a normal sweater, he'd probably remove it and throw it in the washing machine. But this isn't any normal piece of clothing."
"I'm pretty sure I got super glue in my hair."
"Oh man, Zenith. I barely even touched it, what the heck?"
"I flew free of the trees and straight into the side of the fence at the base of the tower."
"Once sent Liston's haste to remove a leg, his knife took a testicle along with it. Oops."
"I waste Brown makeup from the top of the Gown all the way to the very bottom and hit the floor and it was a brown streak down the whole gown."
"It sucks when just like mishmash stuff sort of happens you know uh and it leads it points you in a very brutal direction."
"And then once you get the lid off, that's where the danger, the pickle juice in the eye comes along."
"hey is that a hickey this was actually uh an octopus related incident"
"He forgot his pilot license, oh god, he showed up, got up, was on the plane and then apparently the pilots when you're on there, some person who works at the airport then comes down they check with the cockpit and go can I just see your ids to make sure you guys are the pilots."
"I stepped on my daughter's water bottle last night."
"We get in the Uber to go to the shuttle and I immediately spill coffee all over the front of me."
"I can't say I've ever reeled a flathead in on the wrong pole before. I wasn't expecting that, I was not expecting that. This is an absolute disaster, disaster."
"And as I looked at this man's brand new fence and fence posts, the fence was so new that the post had just come out the ground and the rapid set concrete weren't even dry yet, and I knocked over the whole fence."
"I got to run in my stocking. That makes two."
"And then I'm screaming about how good Titanic is and I slip on the subway stairs... and death drop, fully death drop."
"Oh freaking bent the handle on my tool."
"I started trying to rate some of the Dr out and it started leaking out and made a huge mess."
"HVAC leak at work busted through a ceiling tile and wrecked her cubicles. Building owner sent someone to shop vac up the water and the shop vac broke and dumped it by another cubicle."
"It all went horribly wrong, but it was kind of a great adventure."
"Oh, you're such a had a lot of conversations. It was a good time. Yeah, it was. Who'd you [ __ ]? Nobody. I fell asleep in an Uber on the way home."
"Jake accidentally did the Kylie Jenner lip challenge one time."
"bought the walnuts and nut cricket from local market just drop the lid off the pan and it shattered the entire glass top stove"
"was trying to boil water turned on the wrong burner and my glass baking dish exploded guess its takeout tonight"
"Accidentally smashed my watch instead of bull while playing tennis."
"My car fell into a sinkhole at the beach but that sunset is magical."
"I made eye contact with my boyfriend and lifted my leg apart instead. I pushed a little too hard and just pissed on the floor like a ducking dog while making eye contact with this poor man."
"In the 80s, I had a Mooney with a problem of non-pressurized magnetos. They were installed by mistake, and the engine quit over the North Atlantic."
"With that little mishap out of the way, I can set up for the actual threading."
"The curse of the camera strikes again, but you never know, I'm in the right place, I'm in the right swim."
"One of the sailors named Lane got drunk, spun some valves, and caused significant damage."
"I wish we got that on video. I'm making a piece of toast and I just set off the fire alarm."
"We just fell right in line and that's the worst thing that could ever happen to an armored column."
"My orchid was about to rebloom for the first time in five years, my cat had other ideas."
"That guy said get in the hole and broke the mics."
"I only had like a mile ago Dude and I'm like pulled my phone out I was doing something I was kind of looking paying attention and sure enough dude just freaking stuffed one thousand gallons of water hit me right in the face."
"I thought it would be kind of fun to just kind of blow it off off-screen so you could just kind of see them flying everywhere, and the wind blew it back into my mouth. Like, they did not taste good, I'm sure they don't."
"Second tank of the trip and he dies on early days because I'll be paying in it and me trying to be funny."
"This was supposed to be a baked potato. Oh my, that baked potato got baked."
"Boys, boys, I'm not even kidding you, if we didn't get stopped by a tree we would end up just toppling for a couple of months."
"This load here, we got this old Packard. I did knock a hole in the oil pan trying to get out of the frozen ground."
"It's dripping! Oh, it looks like spider webs."
"He says he had an accident with his barbecue grill."
"In conclusion, took a crap, blocked a toilet, traumatized a janitor, and flooded the lobby."
"...dude I'm close ten feet away Oh God it broke bread the father broke Rhett well I guess we're going hiking..."
"Tristram Shapiro said he was mortified after a mishap on Zoom."
"Just pray for me that I don't literally eat poop and fall on my face."
"No, no. Sorry about that. The water was too warm and made the stuff come off."
"I saw it fly out as I sneezed, funny."
"I guess that's our ranking right here, ladies and gentlemen. Oops, hit my mic."
"They didn't put my bag on the plane."
"Oh no, that came off so right on me. Oh, could get a kick left. Okay, yeah, yeah, you really don't get flat lies out here. No, another one."
"You die you die this is bad and I was like but I don't know who's insurance I literally said this I was like he's insurance does your insurance cover this."
"Suddenly something goes through the window. We shoot at it but it ain't the thing... it's my landlord's dog, just the body though, not his head or legs."
"I'm just gonna keep it on in hand the whole time now just because like if it does charge me I'm gonna like raise us above my head wave around and screamed like this guttural scream which will work part of the part of the portage to get my bag."
"I avoid him and my toes hit the Dasher board and I shatter my big toe in my skate. The cap shatters... Oh no!"
"I was going to give you 50 bucks if we can warm up with your ball somebody just took ours."
"We literally broke the toilet in here, Preston. It's bad, you have to help."
"Several hours later in the morning, Jesse sent his girlfriend a text message but since Lauren left her phone at the bar, he got a reply from a bar employee instead."
"I literally knew this was gonna happen. I just dipped my paintbrush in the water I was drinking. The world doesn't want me to be hydrated, I guess."
"Stop! Oh, I got a bunch of blue dye on my butt, I don't think that's good."
"I accidentally vaporized my pre-algebra teacher."
"Wow, that would have been bad. I mean, it is bad, but it would have been worse had they all been standing up."
"I lost a tennis match when a bee buzzed up the leg of my shorts at a crucial moment."
"Once while trying to impress a date, I landed flat on my back in a flower bed."
"The condom did split, it was my birthday when it happened."
"The top of the tent gave away, and all basically opened up. All this water came down, messed up my laptop. Every 'R' he's got two... No, he's got two tampons... He's not covering blood."
"The Tacoma Narrows Bridge, a slender span that once arched gracefully across the Tacoma Narrows straight in Washington state, has earned its place in history as one of the most iconic engineering mishaps."
"I got locked in one of the boot skips, missed the training session, I was locked in the boot skip for two hours."
"I want to show you what just happened, I just got this all over my car."
"Mom was eager to get on the road so she woke Roderick up and told him to get in the shower but I probably should have mentioned to him that the pig was in the bathtub before he stepped in."
"Things went a little off track as Leang grabbed the whip."
"...out of nowhere she gasped real loud and I look over and she's got gravy all interlock because she dumped the bowl in her lap."
"Nanny Plum, please don't make too much magic jelly this time. We don't want a repeat of last year's jelly flood."
"In a fit of peak, he threw my luggage across the tarmac. All of my underwear strewn about as an America West flight flew over, it blew them into the nether regions. Not the nether regions they should be in, up my [ __ ]."
"Toy Story 2 was almost cancelled because they accidentally deleted the whole entire movie."
"The beginnings of frustration were starting to set in. How the hell could I get my truck stuck the first time I meet Amanda? She's not even going to want to hang out with me after the way this night is going."
"Until I got hit with a can of corn."
"Well, like I said, I peed down at the phone booth and I called. Well, my beep went off, and I tried to call the number on my beep, and it was a long-distance number on the beep. So I went in the store to try to get a car car. When I come out, the car was gone through."
"I just spilled my milkshake all over my boobs, and I got strangely aroused by it."
"Rinsing it under warm water... you're [ __ ] of."
"What do you mean falling over the chair and showing my panties was too much?"
"Man he [__] just seen that [__] in 4k man I'm over here icing this [__] up and decorating this [__] whole goddamn gingerbread house just came crashing down like a tsunami."
"Accidents happen to everyone–but when SpongeBob breaks his butt in a sandboarding accident, he becomes a total shut-in afraid to go outside at all."
"Pick it out when I drove the Jeep down to Fred's birthday party I broke it really bad."
"...in one of the greatest botches in wrestling history the match would end with the two men being the last remaining and accidentally eliminating each other at the same time."
"Poor old Emma Moon that undefeated I am took the dumbest bump ever for seemingly no reason."
"Camera shakes too sometimes. Yep, that's right. It just tipped over. The good news is that iPad didn't."
"It was so funny, too. Like, she brought her dog and you know, my team was like playing with the dog. And tell me why, when she went to the restroom, I, like, nearly sat on the dog. And I was like, 'Oh my god!'"
"...got that jig right out on the end of that Wing Dam, I felt it hit the Rocks, got snagged, popped it out, got snagged, popped it out, and then the very next fall that thing cracked."
"He didn't really fall the best on this one."
"Oh my God my ow does it hurt what the happened oh my God it's a Home Depot bag he literally bleached the Home Depot shopping bag onto his head."
"Toya broke all them people's damn dishes. Praise the Lord they got in the production company car on fine."
"I almost killed myself making a quesadilla."
"Live on stage it's gotta be so embarrassing because you're trying to prove that you're like the technologically superior brand and then right on stage the one thing that could go wrong goes wrong."
"I managed to jump clear at the last moment, but unfortunately, I broke a leg. It belonged to passport two, he was underneath me."
"My friend hid my AirPods in a box of chicken nuggets that I proceeded to microwave without opening the box."
"We're taking a little pause. We just got stuck in the elevator."
"You're going to break something just buying watermelons."
"Yo, we just lost the drone. Do we just lose the drone?"
"Couple have wedding video ruined by pooping seagull."
"I jumped over the chain-link fence, and in doing so, my t-shirt caught it and it pulled me down on it."
"My picnic on the river had turned into a panic on the river."
"They have all recently broken a world record, apart from Tony Sutton who dropped what he thought was the world's smallest egg before it could be verified."
"I've pulled its head off!" - Oops moment with nail polish
"No luck on the propane tank, but we did get two bags of fertilizer for our toilet."
"Unfortunately, during the tussle, he inadvertently breaks the basketball board."
"My boot fell apart in the middle of a long hike in the summer."
"I never had a chance to even put a hand over my mouth. I projectile vomited my entire breakfast and lunch across the conference room table."
"Wife and I went to Mexico for our honeymoon. I had the idea of buying a bottle of tequila and drinking a shot every anniversary. It broke on the way home."
"Why do all our Renovations turn into swimming pools?"
"But it's not in white, not on my face, because it went to my eyes, along here, top of me."
"That didn't go so well, the shower was locked."
"I accidentally flushed the toilet and everyone just stopped talking. Luckily, no one cared and they all laughed about it."
"Things turned out funnier and scarier when the Prof went on with the screaming and we could hear her calling her house help and brother, alarming them of a fire sparking up her switchboard."
"I was flung to the right, the scooter went to the left."
"My breakfast burrito peed on me this morning I still have seven hours of work and it would be a 50-mile round trip to go home and change."
"...she's getting into computer Compu and I don't like her messing with my computers cuz the last time she did that she clicked something and let's just say I lost a lot of files in a couple of videos."
"I almost fell! I almost lost it on the moving walkway. I didn't see the moving walkway, I thought I slipped for a second going down the backwards drop."
"Oh, that's great. When he drove into the pool."
"I had like gotten stuff all over my arm from the fall. I had to do laundry because the shirt was white, so that got all messed up."
"So when I... I came down on this calf first and... I... I missed the... the thing that you would put your feet on and then my calf just went... oh man."
"This was a result of the two-machine setup cuz Christian was doing names on one machine with a fast clamp and accidentally stitched the name out on the other machine."
"I just had a real bad, real bad accident... it went south."
"The joke is, oh no, bathroom wallpaper gone wrong!"
"I had an error with my motor so I went to shore and I filled my boot up with water and I can't get it back on. You got one shoe on? Oh my God, you can't get back on? No, I couldn't get it. Uh-oh."
"Bike bike bike bike bike didn't get it on camera."
"It's just too bad his incomplete tights had to spoil the moment."