"By exercising your brain, you could become witty in conversation, remember more details, become more charming and charismatic, and solve problems to take your career to the next level."
"She’s also considered an extraordinarily influential writer, ahead of her time, frustratingly mistreated in her profession because of her gender and incredibly good at writing the most incredible burns disguised as polite conversation."
"I love this quote, 'Anything you can do, I can do meta.'"
"It's why I love literature and the art of wit because it zooms to the truth so much more quickly."
"Demiwiggin is just an enchanting adventure about courage, generosity, and the use of one's wits."
"You need some witty leaders, you need some witty friends, you need to marry someone that has wit."
"There's these little moments of kind of wit like that."
"I love banter witty banter teasing arguing..."
"Adorable romance between two lovely characters that features witty banter."
"He had some witty replies, he stood on his own two feet and made lemonade with the lemons he had been given."
"I'd rather beat you with my wit. It's a lot more rewarding."
"Thanks to Kelly Fremon Craig's witty screenplay and Hailee Steinfeld's lovable performance, The Edge of Seventeen gives us an angsty teen who we can all sympathize with."
"Megan has the same type of clever funny energy as well I think if she were to come back at Nikki she would be just as slick with her words"
"Well, being a clever man, the culprit chose to die of old age."
"Not the sort of wit I've come to expect from you."
"Comedy is saying the thing people don't want to say with wit."
"May you one day be as small as you act." - D.L. Hughley
"Wit is what oft was thought but never so well expressed." - Alexander Pope
"You have a sharp tongue, that's another weapon I can use."
"If it don't make sense it ain't making dollars."
"Wit is a propriety of thoughts and words elegantly adapted to the subject."
"True wit is distinct from everyday conversational wittiness."
"Great wit must be accompanied by that quality without which a man can have no wit at all: sound judgment."
"I always thought I was pretty clever... This is clever."
"Your mum jokes? I think they're brilliant. Your mom's so stupid, she stared at a carton of apple juice for 12 hours because it said concentrate."
"I'd rather be Captain Obvious than Captain Oblivious. Mmm, that was a bar. Why was that a bar?"
"If you have quick recall, that's how you become witty."
"A witty person uses words in a smart and funny way."
"It's like life's like a box of chocolates but not quite as clever."
"I trust you, EDITH stands for Even Dead I'm The Hero."
"Expect the unexpected, Oscar Wilde once quipped."
"What's operative in humor is a kind of quick contrasting."
"Denial is not just a river in Egypt." - Jane Elliott
"You gotta get up pretty early in the morning to catch the Prince of Thieves."
"Your conversations were very effortless, intelligent, witty."
"The toxic decor of Longwood House gives a new meaning to Oscar Wilde's infamous last words."
"There's that sparkle in his eye of that he just thought of something really witty and really funny."
"You're witty and urbane, and you have a twinkle about you."
"He had a serviceable brain, quick enough wits, and a work ethic deep enough to carve a good life somewhere, given the chance."
"They feel like that you're very humorous, you're very witty."
"A nose by any other name would smell as sweet."
"Who needs brawn when you've got some brain?"
"I was too busy over here flexing my brain, not my muscles."
"It's the whole package, right? It could be the looks, your personality, the jokes, your pickup lines because you're witty."
"Why do elephants need trunks? Because they don't have glove compartments."
"They're very fair, incredibly wise, incredibly witty."
"Sometimes you're almost charming."
"Very few people are as funny or witty as Tyrion."
"I kind of liked the delivery and the very dry wit of that."
"I think he was a like a naturally funny guy and one of those guys there was an Irish wit."
"You sail to the ends of the Earth and beyond to fetch back witty Jack."
"I might be a bird for brains, but darling, I know how to bite."
"Smart ass boy teaches stupid ass chat a thing or two."
"There's something funny about you, not LOL funny, but more thoughtful and well observed."
"You've always been sharp as a whip."
"I got a 40 but they said trade a truth up in the building."
"Why gamble with Gambit it's just a different type of fire on the car when I touch it."
"I love the galliard sarcasm, you know."
"I'm just dropping zingers left and right like true comedy."
"I'm out comedying, I'm out funnying the funny people."
"Wit is not a requirement of the job, but an ability to inflict pain, absolutely."
The other day, my little girl talked back to my wife. My wife told her to do something, she said, "no, I don't want to." I had to pull her aside and say, listen, you got to teach me how to do that. You might be a genius.
"I love how easily he turns it back on them."
"When someone insults you and it's actually a good one you haven't heard before."
"Lincoln once said that Dixie 'is smarter than my whole cabinet.'"
"The humor in the show was clever and witty."
"You're very smart, you're very witty... you're definitely able to make decisions."
"There's a lot of full-blown double entendres."
"Comedy is pretty much the same. If you're saying some shitty [ __ ] to me, I already know what I'ma say back to you, right?"
"It’s important to know which characters have the most wits… even when they’re riding dragons into battle."
"He would have had a perfect SAT score, but for the question on zugma."
"You have a really quick mind, quick wit, and you're just quick at learning things."
"Ever notice that the word 'synonym' doesn't have a synonym? Shots fired, baby."
"You're smart and quick-witted. Conversations with you are very profound."
"Refill you up with plenty of witty remarks, jokes, dad jokes, unique jokes, sweet jokes."
"His crowd work is great, he's got great wit."
"What do you say to a cocktail, Coach Lasso?" "Oh, the same thing I'd say to Diane Sawyer if she ever asked me out on a date: yes, please."
"Being witty is much easier than you might think."
"There's nothing better than a good pun."
"He possesses a natural wit and charm that instantly draws you in."
"Your head's so big when your thought comes up they like typewriters."
"A super super smart witty talented mind."
"Writing with irreverent wit, a deep knowledge of history, and a disregard for conventional economic pieties."
"If you counter your argument and also make fun of your weird f*cked up nose, that's not an ad hominem, that's just, we also insulted you."
"He's funny... he's a great shit-talker."
"I don't know if there's a joke there but no, I think that's an example of like the punchline is so strong."
"The wits quipped that she'd given up king for a queen."
"Want to hear a joke? My ex-wife still misses me, but her aim is getting better."
"She had a cutting type of wit. It didn't take her long to put folks in their place."
"He's very quick-witted. I absolutely love it."
"Style icons aren't always the most beautiful, they're just the wittiest."
"Jesus is not only the king of kings, Jesus is king of the clapback."
"Pound for pound, Warwick Davis is one of the funniest people I've ever met."
"I taught my cousin to hold the handle, later on, I was his paw bearer."
"I'm always a few steps ahead of whoever's interviewing. I feel like you are the 'Catch Me If You Can' of comedians."
"They're witty. They like to banter back and forth."
"That was a good thing or like that was, I might say something funny every from time to time whereas like then you have people like yourselves more so R."
"Some of your comebacks are legendary and they're absolutely brilliant."
"JC said I'mma lose 'cause he the dimwitted kind, my punches go over heads of a simpleton's mind."
"First I'm going drop him, then he get the timlin sign. That was tight, that was a good line."
"This is 101 of the world's funniest one-liners. These really are funny, and the gospel is hidden way inside."
"Liverpudlians are known for their wit, their use of language, their play on words. We get that from the Irish."
"Don't worry, Mr. President, we'll be in and out before you can say Chesty Puller at the Chosin."
"Float like a butterfly, sting like a baby."
"You have a brilliant way of weaving in sarcasm."
"The ghost is very much the typical superhero, swagging around with confidence and endless quips."
"This will teach you to say you like old JV and Bruce Forsyth as well."
"A sense of humor is just common sense dancing."
"Humor is the same thing as common sense, it's common sense working at a different speed."
"It's kind of hard to talk with my mouth full, that's what she said."
"What turns everything around but does not move? A mirror. Good job, you are correct."
"I love a good insult, especially one with an original bite to it."
"You could be very funny, witty, quick with comebacks... people are drawn to the way you speak."
"I felt like it made me nicer, it made me funnier, made me smarter."
"Okay, wow, this is an impressive level of stupid. If you're going to end up being held hostage by a guy who was born when the dinosaurs still walked the earth, then you should at least make him work for it."
"It's completely brilliant. It's not shying away from the darkness of it all, it's very much in keeping with the Twisted wit with which the show has been written."
"The only fool I see is you. Oh [__], haha, she got you [__]."
"Brevity is the essence of wit. No."
"Hit you with my [__] glintstone pebble."
"Your mind is very attractive, articulate, and quick-witted."
"Jeff just simultaneously roasted the entire class plus the teacher in one fell swoop."
"Someone who's very smart, very intelligent, very quick-witted."
"Jane Austen is funny and so clever, observing. She's very witty and ironic. She's merciless at looking at people's vanities and foibles."
"In love with Laura? Considered me the wisest, the wittiest, the most interesting man she'd ever met."
"Tell my virginity I was never going to lose it anyway."
"Dorothy replied, 'Get me a new husband.'"
"The most vicious thing about me is my wit."
"I'm no Sherlock Holmes, are you? Well, whether you are or not, here's your chance to match wits with Police Lieutenant Michael Forbes."
"Why was Samantha Stevens a witch? Because both her husbands were dicks."
"What does a nosy pepper do? Gets jalapeno business!"
"Their way with words and natural wit make them incredibly charismatic by default."
"the dialogue was great and I'm wondering how much of it was on the page or how much of it was just improv because there was so much of it and it was so sharp and it was so witty"
"Yeah, I know. I don't have to outrun the bear. I just have to outrun you."
"I'd show you mine, sir, but it's at Summerhall."
"Quotations from Hamlet: Brevity is the soul of wit."
"Brevity is the soul of wit after all."
"Very clever, I like that you knew to think that."
"A battle of wits you say? I'm intrigued."
"I said, 'The rest of this better be a fucking equation.' 'If you lost a couple of stone, we could probably go out.' I said, 'Only if the couple of stone I lost was me fucking head.'"
"That is fair, that is what a demon would say."
"She was like thank you Tupac, would have shot him but a slap is good enough."
"Clark goes out with another incredible line."
"He's like, 'I know my ABC's too,' and I was like, 'Oh, it's funny!'"
"Is that plant on your head growing a second brain because you're so smart?"
"Sarcasm may be the lowest form of wit, but it's also a great tool for masking social awkwardness."
"Uncommon sense. I still have to make that a shirt."
"When someone asks, 'Did you get a haircut?' your response is, 'No, I got them all cut.'"
"Tony Hawks managed to smuggle four truths past the rest of the panel,"
"The general idea was that a poem was something in quatrains and it rhymed and it was full of strict wit."
"Big brains, come on, big brain time."
"I detect a note of digestive tract."
"I have literally outsmarted your outsmarting."
"I love how he slides in all those subtle burns"
"That's the funniest (beep) you've said."
"I don't get ready, I stay acid ready. That's a double joke, oh, it's a double joke, this two-for-one for free."
"Ru, what I admire most about you is your ability to look at these tired queens and always find a compliment for them. You're so full of (beep) the toilet's jealous."
"I loved her character. She was a black widow that was like 'who's the next guy, come on, let's keep it moving'."
"Still got it hot dog, that's a decent joke."
"You played your last hand, Joker, and admittedly you had a straight flush, but... I, uh... Damn it, I had something for this... I'm the king of clubs."
"Jujube still managed to stand out for her wit and candor."
"Willem didn't usually get loud during conflicts with her fellow queens, but she didn't need to. Even when they were quiet, her clever retorts were perfectly timed."
"They make like witty jokes, that's like what I'm getting, like super cute."
"What would you be putting your dick in if it wasn't for me?"
"I just bullet and I go, 'Pull up my gun, your biggest talent is being Larry David's friend.' Boom!"
"Okay some people see this matchup as a true surprise and some stupid guys claim my wit was no match for your ruthless style cause yours will do or die."
"Here we are last xmus you didn't take us to last xmus you took us to next exus."
"Dear Duff, I prithee contradict thyself and say it is not so."
"Amazing! A booby trap that actually catches boobies!"
"Bill, I ain't really got no issues with you besides you getting pennies for your thoughts. Imagine what a nickel would do."
"And you, Miss, are no lady. But don’t think that I hold that against you. Ladies have never held any charm for me."
"Finders keepers, losers weavers, right?"
"Miss Piggy, that's the original gold digger. Miss Piggy right there, she knew what she was doing."
"If I'm doing crowd work, the other person's in trouble."
"That part for me was so hilarious, not like the hahaha side splitting laughter, but like the oh snap, that was an actually good line."
"Just make sure you remember that before you try to pull something," she quipped.
"All of my brilliant and pointed comebacks were left on the cutting room floor. Darn the luck."
"Look at you now, hey Flair! Call the Smithsonian, tell them we got one half of that dinosaur exhibit they were looking for."
"Well, some will disparagingly call you a bluestocking for it, Miss Bentley, but let me assure you, any man worth his salt will prefer a young lady who demonstrates that she has something more than fluff between her ears."
"The difference between a horse and a mule? A mule asks you for his resume."
"When somebody said, 'That's not very funny,' but he goes, 'No, but it's very punny.'"
"I have a system too," he said. "I don't pay for liquor that I haven't asked for and haven't drunk."
"Please forgive me if I appear down in the mouth this evening, but I've just had some bad news. Tomorrow, it's the mother-in-law's funeral. She's canceled."
"Revenge is sweet but not fattening." - William Frederick Cody
"I'm bored. What an awful thing to say." - Oscar Wilde
"I am ready to meet my maker, whether my maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter." - Winston Churchill
"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, then baffle them with [__]."
"His humor is as sharp as a ninja's blade."
"His comebacks are sharper than a Taylor's needle."
"It's witty, it talks about relationships in a positive way."
"Well I guess I know enough to turn you inside out, you sockdologizing old man-trap."
"I didn't enlist in the army I was drafted so I wasn't gonna make life easy for anyone when I was going through my physical the doctor asked me softly can you read the letters on the wall what letters I answered slyly very good said the doctor you passed the hearing test."
"If Futurama can work in 2023, it'll work on the strength of its wit, of its imaginative playful reuse of sci-fi tropes."
"Being funny is the cleverest thing you can do."
"Tyrion is clever and witty, and he's often referred to as the Imp, which highlights his ability to outsmart his opponents and use his intellect as a weapon."
"They love that you're so quick with it, okay? You're witty."
"I love it. He waltzes in and takes all my drugs, and then he tangos out."
"You just carry a bag full of jokes with you wherever you go."