Before I Let You Go Quotes
"Chaos is the only guarantee in life that I've come to trust."
"You're thirty now, Annie. Are you ever going to grow up?"
"I'm not seeing my sister—I'm seeing a wasteland after war."
"She’s a mess. You should have known her before. She was amazing."
"I can't let that happen to my baby. I just can't."
"I've been a GP for several years—I thought my poker face was pretty good, but I'm not prepared for this."
"This is my baby sister. This is the same kid I shared a room with for our entire childhood."
"I didn't just 'throw her out.' I’d only ever made things worse in all of my attempts to help her."
"But I’ve been dealing with her addiction for years, and even after a two-year break from the drama, the weariness returns as soon as she does."
"Creativity, passion, courage, optimism—in this moment, I see only the essence of who Annie really is."
"You’ve chosen to come here with us and do the right thing for your baby."
"But I can’t afford this place," Annie whispers.
"I don’t even know you. I can’t let you do that."
"I want what’s best for you and for the baby."
"All that matters is doing what we can now for you and the baby, okay?"
"I’m going to try harder, I really am. I really want to be a good mom."
"Thank me when we get that baby safely out into the world and well."
"We’re going to figure all of this out, okay? Let’s talk some more over the weekend."
"I love you for suggesting it, I really do. But people are relying on you."
"You’re the only person who matters to me, Lex."
"I’ve missed you," I say simply, and Annie glances at me.
"Lexie, all that I want to do is k-keep my baby,"
"Maybe she can make it work this time. Maybe the baby is reason enough for her to finally, finally get her shit together."
"This is not who Annie was supposed to become."
"Even though I’ve let you down again and again?" she murmurs.
"What if she doesn’t satisfy the demands of the court in full, she’ll be tried for the chemical endangerment offense."
"I mean it, Lexie. I’m here for you, in any way you need me. Okay?"
"But I can’t let my one-week-old baby go into fucking foster care,"
"I don’t know if she’ll finish that rehab program."
"Shame is heavy on me . . . it’s crushing . . . suffocating."
"We’re going to fix this, all of it, bit by bit, piece by piece, we’re going to put your life back together."
"Women should care for their homes and the men. They don’t need to study more than that."
"Hands off, bitch," she says lightly. "You’ve got Sam. Marty McFly is all mine."
"I’ll still keep my notebooks," I said. "I’ll just be more careful to hide them."
"Focus your energies on the Lord and learning your Bible."
"I wished that we could be a normal family again."
"Your stories are better than anything you’ll find in this stupid cult."
"You’ll be a great mom. You’ve already had a lot of practice."
"Twinkle, twinkle, little star, do you know how loved you are?"
"It’s over, Annie. You’re with me now. It’s over."
"Twinkle, twinkle, little star. Do you know how loved you are? In the morning, in the night. I’ll love you with all my might."
"Understanding my pain does not mean I can control it."
"I never told her about Robert—although I thought about it."
"You just need to work a little bit harder till you catch up. You can do this, Annie."
"I was on edge all of the time, and it was exhausting."
"No one was ever going to have the power to tell me how to live my life, not ever again."
"I started to sober then, noticing at last the fear and the confusion in her eyes."
"I’m smart—not Lexie smart, but smart enough to have a level of self-awareness."
"It was like I was pressed down into the couch by an exceedingly pleasant weight that dissolved me somehow."
"It’s okay, I just wish there was something more I could say. But there isn’t."
"I’m feeling frustrated. Because you think that I need you to baby me, and I don’t want to let you right now."
"I’ve always had to be the adult—the only adult."
"I’m a fixer—that I’m The Fixer in my family."
"I want you to stumble and let me pick you up."
"It was months before Lexie told me Mom and Robert gave her the money for me to go to a private rehab clinic."
"I’ll give you some time alone with Lexie and Daisy at the end, after we talk. Okay?"
"We hold our pregnant woman on a pedestal in this society."
"In the last few years I’ve heard all sorts of politicians talking about compassion for people with addiction, but you know what I’ve never heard? No one ever talks about compassion for women who are pregnant and have addictions."
"Half the town is on fire, and the townspeople are all so busy hollering for the fire brigade that no one thinks to find out why people are still playing with matches."
"This isn’t your fault. Annie was tortured. I don’t know why this happened. Who can understand these things?"
"But I’ll be damned if I’m going to make the same mistake twice."
"You know I chose to submit to him, Lexie. It’s not always easy walking the path of righteousness."
"I should have known. She was so broken when she came out. I should have known something had happened."
"I’ve seen the journey with her eyes, instead of mine—and I’m exhausted."
"I’ve had enough hiding; now I want to embrace the truth, regardless of how painful it is."
"I can tell Daisy that her mother never got the help that she needed or deserved, and that a system that only wanted to protect Daisy managed to drive her mother to the brink."
"Secrets can poison a person, and vulnerability can make a person strong."
"You should plan to have Daisy for a long time, Lexie—I’m so sorry for the burden."
"She will know you as her mother, and she will probably call you Mom—I’m okay with that, she needs a mom."
"I live my life in the past, in my pain and my rage and my hate."
"I’ll find a way to give her daughter the life that she deserved."