Where'd You Go, Bernadette Quotes
"Galer Street School is a place where compassion, academics, and global connectitude join together to create civic-minded citizens of a sustainable and diverse planet."
"Her love of learning is infectious, as are her kindness and humor."
"I understand she is applying to boarding schools back east. I envy the teachers who get to meet Bee for the first time, and to discover for themselves what a lovely young woman she is."
"The choice of private schools is both fear-based and aspirational."
"Let's just say that it was so huge and so hideous that it made me want to flee L.A. and never return."
"But how else are you ever going to get a word with that woman? She’s like Franklin Delano Roosevelt. You see her only from the waist up, driving past."
"The worst thing that can happen to a gifted child is for her to grow bored."
"So it would be in pretty bad taste to deny Buzzy this."
"The sooner you learn it’s on you to make life interesting, the better off you’ll be."
"Anyone with talent who stayed would be flattened under an avalanche of equality."
"Who can blame him? I’ve grown accustomed."
"I feel bad because I think I might have messed her up."
"Just because they’re Mercedes Parents doesn’t mean they’re not highly receptive to free shit."
"Our objective is for the Mercedes Parents to see and be seen."
"You know what I say? I say, dare not to get a tattoo."
"The motto of this city should be the immortal words spoken by that French field marshal during the siege of Sebastopol, 'J’y suis, j’y reste'—'I am here, and here I shall remain.'"
"Our daughter's heart hadn’t developed completely, so it had to be rebuilt in a series of operations."
"I’ve gotten into a dispute with a neighbor—yes! again!—and this time, in retaliation, I put up a sign and inadvertently destroyed her house."
"I tried to switch schools, but the other good schools I could have sent Bee to… well, to get to them, I’d have to drive past a Buca di Beppo."
"I’m joking! I’ve been ordering shit off the Internet!"
"The drivers here are horrible. And by horrible, I mean they don’t realize I have someplace to be."
"Come at me, even in love, and I’ll scratch the hell out of you."
"People like you must create. If you don’t create, Bernadette, you will become a menace to society."
"Life is stew, and pot is poop. If someone stirred even a teeny-tiny bit of poop in the stew, would you really want to eat it?"
"I could feel the curious eyes upon me. Who’s that? What’s she doing with Elgin Branch?"
"Your only mistake was telling the team you were leaving in the first place. I could have covered for you, and nobody would have known."
"It was such a nice day, we decided to get some sandwiches at the deli downstairs and bike to a nice spot off campus."
"I’m not sure Elgie knows any of them, but he’s led so many gigantic meetings, and been on so many teams, that his face is familiar to hundreds, if not thousands, of MS employees."
"The momentary silence was followed by giggling."
"I’d rather ruin her with the truth than ruin her with lies."
"The truth was I didn’t understand what the lady was saying. But I was being a little bitch in general, so I let Dad have this one."
"I’m not kidding, it took me, like, fifteen minutes."
"I wish a camera had been trained on me, because it would show what it looks like for a woman to be awakened to the truth."
"The whole thing is completely tragic, in my opinion. But what do I know? I’m just a Seattle-born secretary."
"I’m sorry about Bee, I’m sorry about Bernadette, I’m sorry about the baby."
"The future was glorious, and it was opening itself up to us."
"People don’t go to Antarctica. They’re called to Antarctica."
"Ice. It’s trippy, symphonies frozen, the unconscious come to life, and smacking of color: blue."
"The sky in Seattle is so low, it felt like God had lowered a silk parachute over us."
"I have no idea what I’d be without the other."
"All those ninnies have it wrong. The best thing about Seattle is the weather."
"You’re a child of the earth, the United States, Washington State, and Seattle."
"Say yes, and I’ll be gone an extra month. I’ll return and work on my plans for the new South Pole Station, you’ll graduate Galer Street and go to Lakeside, Dad will continue making the world a better place at Microsoft, and we’ll move into a normal house, dare I say, a Craftsman?"