Confessions Of A Forty-Something F**k Up Quotes
"It’s like I missed a turning somewhere. Like there was a destination marked ‘Forty-Something’ and my friends and I were all heading that way, youth in one hand, dreams in the other, excited and full of possibilities."
"By writing down all the things you’re grateful for, you will feel more positive, stop negative thought patterns and transform your life."
"It’s not the Bahamas and tropical palm trees; it’s Destination Forty-Something and comprises a loving husband, adorable children and a beautiful home."
"I mean, FFS. Who doesn’t have the heating on in January?"
"I was planning to come back to London, rent my own flat, fill it with scented candles, and get my life back together again."
"I didn’t want to share a fridge with strangers. Or, God forbid, a bathroom. It was fun when we were young, but not now."
"The only problem with getting older is you lose your friends and loved ones. They die off all around you, one by one."
"Don’t worry about getting older, worry about becoming dull."
"The only new things I have to report are a broken engagement, a rented room and my recent unemployment."
"Everyone goes on about the big Four-O, but in reality turning forty is no big deal. Forty is easy. Forty is a big party and a new dress."
"I tried not to think about any more metaphors, but stuck my gloved hand in the poo bag and started scooping it up."
"I’ll take Arthur with me. And a book. Things are always better with a book."
"I’m going to practise patience. It’s OK, it’s no big deal, just a case of cold feet."
"I mean, it’s a bit messed up when you think about it, making money from someone else’s sorrow."
"Who needs life-affirming sunshine and tanned feet in flip-flops when you can have an electric blanket?"
"I don’t know how the Hollywood celebs do it. But then, does anyone really believe those press statements?"
"I didn’t even get me a card. But you told me to ignore it. Yes, but you weren’t really supposed to ignore it."
"I might feel like a fuck-up, but I am a very responsible person!"
"I haven’t cried once and I rarely use Facebook. OK, so that’s not exactly true. I’ve welled up a few times and glanced at his page."
"It’s like there’s this new competition to see who can be the busiest. ‘How are you?’ ‘Crazy busy!’ ‘Me too! Absolutely manic!’"
"You can go from feeling gloriously happy to feeling like you’re never going to be happy again."
"The reason two people come together is to feel like they’re not alone. Not physically, but emotionally."
"I once read somewhere that the reason two people come together is to feel like they’re not alone."
"Nature teaches you to have patience and faith. Life’s just a cycle, you know."
"Feeling like a fuck-up isn’t about being a failure, it’s about being made to feel like one."
"It’s the pressure and the panic to tick all the boxes and reach all the goals… and what happens when you don’t."
"Nature is a lot like life. Just when you think you’ve seen off the worst of winter, it throws you a curveball."
"When life buries us under all its heartache and disappointment, think about a seed."
"It needs to be buried in order for it to grow. That’s how the magic happens."
"I’m not sleeping with him. I only signed up properly when I got the message from you."
"I think I’m going to stick with the old-fashioned, crossing-of-paths, fate stuff. If love wants to find me, it will."
"Because life isn’t a museum, Nell. I don’t want to live in the past."
"I can marvel at a sunset and think how lucky I am, and wake up in the night with The Fear."
"I’m grateful for failing at my relationship, otherwise I wouldn’t be enjoying the fun of online dating."
"Emotions don’t necessarily have a moral compass. Feelings can’t be shamed into disappearing."
"I might not be a widow, but I know what it’s like to find yourself single when everyone around you is in couples."
"People just don’t know what to do about death. It frightens them."
"Not to put too fine a point on it: ladies, it’s been a while."
"Maybe it’s having your heart smashed to bits."
"I need to start looking around for something a bit more permanent, something with privacy."
"What began as just an arrangement has turned into something so much more."
"It’s basic biology," I said, incredulous.
"I am not having to account for my loo roll usage!"
"I remember when I lived with Ethan, our rent and bills were halved."
"I don’t want to die of some horrible disease if I could help it."
"I was just totally absorbed in the moment."
"My work is focused on the environment, and creating and developing software to deal with renewable energy solutions."
"The people who matter will see you, no matter what."
"Books are meant for sharing, not owning."
"Life can be wonderful but it can also be scary and hard."
"We should be free to feel sad or gloomy or just downright bloody miserable."
"I don’t believe in those. My life’s been memorable enough."
"We can’t all go around being arses to people."
"My husband died. It happens. People die all the time."
"You think you’re keeping the secret, but really it’s keeping you."
"It’s funny, you spend your whole life trying not to get pregnant, you just assume that when you want it to happen it will."
"Life is full of choices and decisions, and there is so much pressure on us to make all the right ones. But what if we don’t?"
"I’ve learned if there’s one gift you can give yourself in life, it’s the freedom and courage to say 'I don’t know'."
"Sometimes in life what you need is for someone to listen."
"We all need a purpose in life, but before Monty died he was my purpose."
"Talking about the D word isn’t going to make me die any quicker."
"You can grieve for someone and the past, but you’ve also got to live."
"Life moves on, whether you’re ready for it or not."
"I feel like if I do one thing I’m failing at all the other things, because no way am I going to get through my to-do list."
"It’s about how life just isn’t how you imagined it was going to be, and how we’re all struggling with the pressure of this perfect life that doesn’t exist."
"Hi and welcome to Confessions of a Forty-Something F##k Up, the podcast for any woman who wonders how the hell she got here, and why life isn’t quite how she imagined it was going to be."
"...struggling to recognize their messy life in a world of perfect Instagram ones and feeling like a bit of a fuck-up."
"Because feeling like a fuck-up isn’t about being a failure, it’s about being made to feel like one."
"...about what happens when shit happens and still being able to laugh in the face of it all."
"I thought I was the only one who felt like this."
"You never really know what you’re doing, so do it anyway."
"The best anti-ageing secret is to stop looking in mirrors."
"You’re not too old, it’s not too late, and yes you can."