The Soulmate Equation Quotes
"Jessica Davis used to think it was an honest-to-God tragedy that only twenty-six percent of women believed in true love."
"We are in the era of women taking pleasure and not apologizing for getting theirs first, second, and one more time for the road."
"It’s the exhausting and alien process of trying to be appealing to men."
"You have plenty of time. Go out there, eat some guacamole, go home."
"I’m talking about not always putting yourself last."
"No matter how hot the man, the name Gregg with two Gs will never be sexy."
"Finding The One? Or getting some freaky intel for a book."
"Once your results are in, we’ll share with you the compatibility scores based on the criteria you’ve chosen."
"It’s about finding a soulmate based on a set of biological markers."
"On your intake form, you can select to see female matches, male matches, nonbinary matches, or all of the above."
"That’s what gives me the most confidence in this company."
"It’s fun to just see what happens when you date guys with no expectations."
"Mom, remember, don’t let Pigeon out because the gardener is here today!"
"It’s just a potentially terrible date, not plastic surgery."
"What happens when you put two completely incompatible people together? Will they beat the odds? Or come out fighting… each other?"
"Don’t ever let anyone tell you you’re not adventurous."
"Maybe you should leave a little earlier next time."
"You’re talking about wanting to have someone to come home to, to talk to, and yeah—to get naked with."
"You aren’t somehow putting Juno second by occasionally putting your needs first."
"Just imagine a world where you find someone who’s perfect for you, and is there for you, and is the head you can lean yours against at the end of the day."
"Any woman would be lucky to hear these words from her 'biological soulmate.'"
"Biological compatibility is independent of whether or not we like each other."
"If we were given a score of twenty-two, would you have believed that?"
"I generally want to commit a felony when I see him."
"I am no broom connoisseur so I shall take your word for it."
"Have I told you how much I love you? Not in the last thirty minutes."
"We can't have kids running up and down the street here. Too many cars, too many people."
"Estimated to be at least $233,610. That's housing, food, transportation, clothing, healthcare, child care, and miscellaneous. And that's only to the age of seventeen."
"I'll handle my side, keeping her out of the spotlight, I just don't want you to assume that you can use her as a prop, too."
"And I keep thinking you’re crazy to not get to know River, but if I got a Diamond Match, would I feel overwhelmed with the pressure and bail, too?"
"We were talking about the implications of knowing every gene, the way that information could be manipulated."
"If you saw her forty years ago, you wouldn’t be."
"I gave them very strict criteria. Apparently, I matched at a statistically unbelievable level with the guy Pops saw me arguing with."
"As long as you have enough data, you can figure out anything."
"You seem responsible, smart, conscientious. Bossy."
"There’s something satisfying about solving little puzzles every day."
"I’d rather be teased for having a name nobody else has than one that a ton of people have."
"We’re both scientists. It wouldn’t be our natures to dive headlong into anything."
"You're asking if I have a four-foot piece of cardboard lying around? Sorry. Fresh out."
"Whoever said money couldn’t buy happiness had never seen this."
"We'll put in a rod that goes down here... And a screw that goes up into your hip."
"You’ve chosen your circumstances, Jess. I like that about you. You take what you want and leave the rest behind. You decide."
"Just keep telling me I’m pretty and it’ll be fine. Oh, and wine. Wine will help."
"I wasn’t thinking of this roomful of people when I put the cologne on earlier. I was thinking of you."
"We’ve been married since 1958. Sixty-three years."
"I think I need to clear something up... About the cologne."
"They’ve never been apart, fifty-six years. I don’t know what Pops would do if something happened to her."
"I’m not sure. We better get my steel-toed boots out of storage just in case."
"I want to hear you recite the odds that we would have met."
"I'm not here for the stock price, Jess. I've said it before. It isn't about the money."
"I want to feel like I can kiss you again by your car at the end of the night."
"This is part of life, Jess. Emergencies and responsibility and managing small fires all the time—but it’s only part of it. There are quiet moments, too. Good moments. Moments when we can ask for more."
"I can’t believe we did it on the floor. In all the times I imagined it, I did not imagine the floor."
"As soon as I said that word, it seemed both a presumption and an underrepresentation."
"The more accurate question is whether I've had a boyfriend since Juno."
"No, not this week. This week I’ve been unable to stop checking in on my Diamond Match."
"Maybe Try Something New Sunday can be bringing Nana home from the hospital. We've never done that before."
"And all of it felt like the tip-top of the roller coaster, the feeling of anticipation before the thrill of the drop."
"The truth of it was so obvious; Jess didn't know how they hadn't been saying I love you from that very first day."
"Statistically speaking, she and River were many thousand times more likely to find their soulmate in a Base Match than they were to ever get an authentic Diamond Match, so even if their true score was a twenty-five, it wasn’t like they couldn’t be right together."
"But she was getting ahead of herself, and without information—without data—it was the last thing she could let herself do."
"You didn’t tell Fizzy? What would I tell her? Five minutes ago, I wasn’t even sure what was going on."
"Statistics can’t tell us what will happen, they can only tell us what might happen."
"You know the crazy thing? We just sent in his spit samples."
"And now, what if I find out that we’re, like, perfect for each other, and it doesn’t matter because he’s married? I don’t want to know if we’re supposed to be together!"
"Anyone who would do something like that is rotten from the inside."
"It was a much easier way to look at the raw scores—Jess could immediately see trends here that she couldn’t in the table."
"I need you to come get me. Why? I think I’m in trouble."
"You said you’ve been sober for eighteen months, so what are you doing drinking at Ann’s? I had one beer."
"I'm not judging. I'm upset that I have a hundred and fifty dollars' worth of groceries in my trunk, including frozen stuff that's probably ruined."
"When I went in for the consult, they said I'm really good at sales, and should come in at the Blue level."
"You have two felonies," Jess said, and her hands were shaking on the wheel now. "California is a three-strike state."
"I'll pay her back out of my cut of the product I have left to sell."
"Don't pay me back," Jess said flatly. "I'm giving this to you. But after I do, I don't want you to call me anymore, and I don't want you to come by."
"I think our bodies needed our brains to shut down for a few minutes."
"I wasn't laughing at you," Jess reminded him. "We were already so much more than a number on a piece of paper."
"I don't want to break up, either," Jess admitted.