I'm Judging You: The Do-Better Manual Quotes
"There are two types of people in this world: people who can be on time and Nigerians."
"Some stereotypes are actual factuals, and the one about Nigerians not being on time for anything is one I won’t even debate."
"It really is terrible to be perpetually tardy for the party, and I am judging everyone who is, especially myself."
"The only way a group dinner can be worse is if there are toddlers present. Let’s be honest, toddlers are the worst."
"If you cannot tell me about it, then odds are you weren’t supposed to do it and you feel guilty. That in itself is wrong."
"Don’t be catching no cases on my dime. I got my Global Entry status and TSA PreCheck to protect."
"If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?"
"People who are girth-blessed get hell for it, but then folks go and objectify them for having ample yanshes."
"What the world needs now is love sweet love, not for people to further shame the plump about their bodies."
"Just because you can’t see the dirt doesn’t mean it’s not there."
"We can’t see gravity, but here it is, holding us down like the ride-or-die partner of life."
"Odds are you’ve sweated at some point over the course of a year, so the bra has accumulated all types of musk."
"Your very presence is frightening for no damb reason."
"I am judging us for needing such an important program, because we’re living in a world where the cycle of sexual abuse thrives and rape culture is considered a myth by too many."
"Rape culture makes it easy for people who are abusive to injure women and makes it hard for women to feel safe."
"Who in the hell left these hateful gates open?"
"We have to teach boys how to see women as more than vessels of sex."
"First of all, treating a woman with respect does not make you good. It makes you someone who is doing the bare minimum."
"Speak up for us, even when we are not in the room."
"Our peers set the standards for our behavior, so when you let terrible things slide, you’re saying it’s okay."
"We need to know that it is never our fault when we get raped."
"Believing that people should make their own choices about their own lives is ultimately what I think it means to be a feminist."
"Feminism hasn’t started any wars, but its battles are mostly fought by self-righteous white women."
"For Black women, not only do we deal with misogyny but racism adds an extra scoop of fuckedupness to the big bowl of crap we have to put up with."
"We need feminism because men won’t get the hell out our wombs."
"The fight for equality on any front does not equate to the oppression of the oppressors."
"If you are free to make your own choices, and think that other women should also have that freedom, you are a feminist."
"When people stop being polite and start getting real."
"The things we are stooping to now to get likes are low-hanging fruit, and it’s a shame."
"Our appetite for this kind of entertainment is as telling about us as anything else."
"Reality TV is now about getting people to behave badly under manufactured circumstances with instigated drama."
"Everything is a circus, everyone is the bearded lady, and everyone—audience included—plays a role in this clown show."
"We’re hypersexual prudes, which makes no sense."
"The game was changed when Kim Kardashian’s sex tape dropped and overnight, she went from being Paris Hilton’s closet cleaner to a known quantity."
"The desperation that comes with wanting fame by any means necessary is alarming, because those types of folks will sell their own mamas for that 'fame.'"
"For every Omarosa, there are a thousand Tecks. Who? Exactly."